Politeness is dead or at least it seems to be half way down its grave. Some of the things we do would horrify us if we had two minutes to cease gaping at that smartphone to actually consider our own actions. Day in and day out, all we see is rude behavior, grunts and smart alec comments. Think back and remember the last time you actually spoke to someone who was polite and no, I don’t mean the airhostess.
Here are some instances of how rudeness has overtaken our daily lives:
Emails: Seriously, most people do not know how to write mails. You have to see my housing community’s mailing list; most people are totally out of control. Some don’t know how to communicate in the language that they are murdering. While others have no control over their raging thoughts and the hopeless expletives that they casually and almost brashly litter their offensive mails with. What is even more shocking is that they don’t for a moment pause to think that this mail may be directed at someone who lives in the neighborhood, an actual living and breathing human being.
Then there are those who don’t know that one is supposed to actually reply to mails. In these times of smartphones-being-extended-anatomy phase, there are folks who will just not reply. It is infuriating both on the professional and personal level. I wonder what it takes to send a two-line reply just in case you are busy enough not to send a full-fledged one.
Namecalling: With social media, namecalling has become fashionable. Yes, you can actually tweet to a celebrity on their handle and call them a#@$%&*. That must be so much fun, I know. Makes you measure up to them. Why? Because you did not like a movie/commercial that they did. FB status updates are free for all. I have seen a couple of my friends (they did not know each other) go after one another simply because they had opposite views to each other. There are those who jump into conversations they have no clue about and often hold flags for people just based on hearsay. And yet some more who do not hesitate in using words like racist, bigot, rapist and harassment in a casual manner not thinking about the hurt they are disseminating. Your own fault being that you have a general impression of being friendly and nice. Everyone is passing judgments in a hurry and they won’t keep their views to themselves. They also wouldn’t pause for a second to think of all that they are doing on public timelines.
Discussions: There is much yelling and less discourse that happens around us. Try raking up a contentious topic and often people quickly descend to namecalling even fist fights. Is there a thing left as not having the last word everytime or agreeing to disagree anymore?
Greeting: While I enjoy saying Namaste to elders and hi to people of my age and younger, try and recall how many children actually greet you these days. The older boys/young men, I was horrified to discover address you as dude. And they cannot complete a sentence without muttering the f word. Did our parents not tell us to greet people or at least smile when we meet them? Women are not far behind with their mood swings. One day they smile and gush and the next day, they look through you. How difficult is a smile, really?
Chivalry: Yes, men hesitate to hold doors open or pull out chairs or offer to help with heavy bags at the risk of being considered old fashioned or even condescending to the ‘weaker’ sex. Leaving gender issues aside, shouldn’t we be doing all these for each other just because they are good manners. Come on, is it too much to expect to be helpful and civil?
Blog: Being a blogger who writes in a public domain and responds to you politely does not give you a right to get overly friendly, abusive or nasty while commenting. Would you be so brutal if we were face to face? Our blogs and social media persona are an extension of ourselves. Should we not be polite and decent there? I wince when I see strangers get too comfortable or rude without reason. Where is nicety and basic etiquette?
Attention deficit syndrome: Have you noticed that our attention is completely divided these days? We are all wildly running keeping our fingers into many pies. No longer do we actually rest once our professional work is done. We are always on the cellphone/tablet/laptop. So much so that I see people in restaurants sitting in groups animatedly engaged with their cellphones. Why did they bother to meet, I think? If it were in my hands, I would ban these gadgets in such places, especially theaters and eateries. I wish we could do the same at homes too. Sigh!
Why is thank you and sorry dying a slow, painful death? Why is smiling and greeting someone becoming outdated? Why is talking to someone without raising your voice becoming such an aberration? Why?
Do you also feel that politeness is dead?







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